Companion dialog page for the Chapter Four narrative.
The house wakes without ceremony. The children are still asleep. The first light has not yet reached the windows with any confidence.
The Wife stands in the kitchen with her purse already closed. The appointment card is not on the counter. Nothing has been left where a question could find it.
Husband:
You are dressed early.
Wife:
I have somewhere to be.
Husband:
Campaign breakfast?
Wife:
No.
(he waits for the rest of the answer; she does not supply it)
Husband:
Is it something I need to know about?
Wife:
You already know enough to understand why I am going. I am going to explore exposure prevention, in various contexts.
Husband:
That is not an answer.
Wife:
We discussed exposure and discretion. Thus, it is the answer that keeps the morning from becoming something else.
The drive is ordinary. That is what unsettles her most.
Fields pass. Church signs pass, "My Grace Is Sufficient For Thee". County markers pass without ceremony. Distance becomes useful only because it gives her fewer familiar faces to account for or be mindful of acknowledging from the stearing wheel and various positions of the Sun trying to blind her, though what a beautiful day.
Intake Clerk:
First time at this office?
Wife:
Yes.
Intake Clerk:
I will need your identification and insurance card.
Wife:
Of course.
(she places both on the counter without hesitation)
Intake Clerk:
Reason for visit?
Wife:
Testing.
Intake Clerk:
Any symptoms?
Wife:
No.
Intake Clerk:
Exposure concern?
(the word sits there longer than the clerk intends)
Wife:
Here is my Verification. I would like to speak only with the Doctor about any concerns I have and if you could, and I am not trying to be rude, only stick to the identification, and if you would not be to much trouble, could you relay to the nurse that I would only like to speak about my vitals with her, and save the pertinent visit information for the Doctor alone, and then they can discern what information is "exposed."
The exam room is too clean to feel personal. The paper on the table makes a small sound every time she shifts her weight.
Per usual in the South, the discussions always are so easily guided out of the boundary anyone puts forth. After all, it's Southern Hospitality and Social Graces.
Nurse:
Everything discussed here is confidential.
Wife:
I understand.
Nurse:
Results will come through the portal unless you request a call.
Wife:
Portal.
Nurse:
You can change that later.
Wife:
I do not like changing records after the fact.
(the nurse pauses, then nods)
Nurse:
Do you feel unsafe at home?
Wife:
No.
Nurse:
Do you feel pressured by anyone to be here?
Wife:
No.
Nurse:
Then what would you like noted?
Wife:
That I came in because certainty is better than assumption. If you do not mind I'll speak to the Doctor about the remaining issues that lay within my visit.
At the government building, the Husband speaks into a microphone with familiar posture. His words are steady enough to pass for conviction.
Reporter:
Are these proposals about technology, morality, or public safety?
Husband:
Those are not separate concerns anymore. The globality of the internet has caused a major convergence that the people we represent, in my opinion, do not ALL carry a foundation for the burden that lay ahead if we do not step in and make some changes in the oversight we provide to "Big Tech."
Reporter:
Critics say the language is broad.
Husband:
Broad problems require broad responsibility. Regardless, we are notorious for broad language. It gives more scope that can be refined as we drill down as a society to the problems that lay ahead.
Colleague:
That will carry well tonight.
Husband:
It needs to.
Colleague:
Need and want are getting hard to tell apart around here.
Husband:
I know what I am doing. I have a great family. I have a great community. I have a great responsibility to all of them to carry this forward.
Colleague:
I hope your house believes that too.
Husband:
Yes, all the houses will see the fact and the scope as we lay it out to guide our communities.
The attorney does not ask why she came alone. People in that office rarely arrive before something has already ended in their mind.
Attorney:
Are you asking about divorce?
Wife:
I am asking about options.
Attorney:
Options before filing or options after filing?
Wife:
Both.
Attorney:
Children?
Wife:
Two.
Attorney:
Financial accounts?
Wife:
Shared enough to require care. Separate enough to require review.
Attorney:
Public position?
Wife:
His.
Attorney:
Public consequence?
Wife:
Ours.
(the attorney writes that down)
Attorney:
Then you do not need drama. You need order.
Wife:
That is why I am here.
The call takes place from her parked car. The engine is off. The windows are up. The world outside continues pretending not to listen.
Retired Investigator:
You have three concerns now.
Wife:
Name them.
Retired Investigator:
Medical privacy. Digital residue. Human memory.
Wife:
The third one is always the problem.
Retired Investigator:
The third one is where agreements matter. Although, the public memory is really in trouble in present day America. It can go either way as far as providing a barrier with safety or no barrier with chaotic results.
Wife:
Agreements do not erase truth.
Retired Investigator:
No. They establish cost, sequence, and consequence.
Wife:
For everyone.
Retired Investigator:
If drafted correctly.
Wife:
I do not want a trap.
Retired Investigator:
Then call it a fence.
Wife:
Fences still keep people in.
Retired Investigator:
And some things out. That's why we have gates, which we can discuss at another time and date.
Dinner is simple because complicated food would admit the day had become complicated. The children do not notice the calculation. They notice whether the rolls are warm.
Child #1:
Are we still doing the fair this weekend?
Husband:
We said we were.
Child #2:
Mom said schedules can change.
Wife:
They can.
Child #1:
Is yours changing?
Wife:
Only enough to make sure everybody has what they need and you two are happy. You are my priority.
Husband:
We are fine.
(the Wife looks at him, not unkindly, but with concern and compassion)
Wife:
Fine is not a plan.
The bedroom has become a place where fewer assumptions are allowed. Lamps remain off. The hallway light does the work neither of them wants to name.
Husband:
Where did you go today?
Wife:
To make sure I knew what I was dealing with. If anything.
Husband:
That sounds like accusation.
Wife:
No. Accusation is emotional. Verification is procedural. How about we don't use accusational in any context of our marriage, the verification, and I am sorry for the shroud of secrecy, is so that I am not running around psychotic. I told you as well to go and check for exposure to anything you may have encountered. I prefer not to say anymore, you are more aware than I about the times in which we live.
Husband:
You went for testing.
(she does not answer quickly; she lets him hear himself understand)
Wife:
Yes.
Husband:
You should have told me.
Wife:
You should have made telling unnecessary.
Husband:
I told you what mattered.
Wife:
You told me what you thought could be survived.
(silence)
Husband:
Are you leaving?
Wife:
I am preparing.
Husband:
For what?
Wife:
For whatever your certainty cannot hold. We will see. This is becoming a merry-go-round, and those are one of the critical things to avoid in any marriage, let's make sure our health is in check and we can continue progressing and not regressing in any aspect of our marriage.
The Husband eventually sleeps. Or performs sleep convincingly enough that the room stops asking questions.
The Wife sits at the small desk near the window. A folder rests beside her. Medical paperwork. Attorney notes. A list of names. A calendar with three dates circled but not labeled.
(phone vibrates)
Political Wife #1:
Did you get what you needed?
Wife:
Enough to stop guessing.
Political Wife #1:
That changes things.
Wife:
It clarifies them.
Political Wife #1:
Does he know?
Wife:
He knows I know how to move now.
(she sets the phone face down)
The house remains standing. The image remains intact. The family remains, for now, in one place.
But the first breach has occurred.
It did not come from a message, a reporter, an opponent, or a rumor.
It came from the moment the Wife stopped preparing to preserve what was and began preparing to survive what might be next. In reality, one county over would never hold any privacy in modern America.